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Writer's pictureMuskaan Ahuja

writeALONG! 19 November

A TUESDAY FEATURE

hosts: Muskaan Ahuja, K.Ramesh

guest editor: Muskaan Ahuja


Only the unpublished poems (that are never published on any social media platform/journals/anthologies) posted here for each prompt will be considered for Triveni Haikai India's monthly journal -- haikuKATHA, each month.


Poets are requested to post poems (haiku/senryu) that adhere to the prompts/exercises given.


Only 1 poem to be posted in 24 hours. Total 2 poems per poet are allowed each week (numbered 1,2). So, revise your poems till 'words obey your call'.


If a poet wants feedback, then the poet must mention 'feedback welcome' below each poem that is being posted.


Responses are usually a mixture of grain and chaff. The poet has to be discerning about what to take for the final version of the poem or the unedited version will be picked up for the journal.


The final version should be on top of the original version for selection.


Poetry is a serious business. Give you best attempt to feature in haikuKATHA !!

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"The secret is not to write about what you love best, but about what you, alone, love at all."

--- Annie Dillard


This is exactly what I choose to do this week! I want you, dear poets, to read this simple yet profound story...

A Zen Master lived the simplest kind of life in a little hut at the foot of a mountain. One evening, while he was away, a thief sneaked into the hut only to find there was nothing in it to steal. The Zen Master returned and found him. "You have come a long way to visit me," he told the prowler, "and you should not return empty handed. Please take my clothes as a gift." The thief was bewildered, but he took the clothes and ran away. The Master sat naked, watching the moon. "Poor fellow," he mused, " I wish I could give him this beautiful moon."



MOON!

It just brightens me up! Moon is an emotion. Moon is our friend. Moon is our companion. One can never get enough of the Moon. Despite being done to death , it continues to amaze us in remarkable ways even if not explicitly stated.


There are certain emotions that Moon brings to one's mind as also expressed by these quotes:


"Hope is the hardest love we carry."

--- Jane Hirshfield



"Absence, the highest form of presence."

--- James Joyce



We all look up at the same stars, same sky, the same Moon, yet we see, we feel different...


Staring down from the bridge

at the moon

broken up

in the river, who

could know, without looking

up, it stands alone above

its shattered self.


--- Tess Gallagher



This week, I encourage you to write poems only about the Moon-- a gorgeous jewel that can never be stolen!!


Beloved Moon, I dedicate this week to you...

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146 comentarios


#1 25.11.24


moonlight throwing

a blanket over the sea

my eyes wide open


Geetha Ravichandran

Chennai


Feedback welcome


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Contestando a

Will attempt a change

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#1 / 24th November 2024


Original --

winter full moon…

a love story lost on

dark skies


Neena Verma, India


Feedback requested. Many thanks.

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Contestando a

I think ‘winter’ is redundant, here.

L2&3 can be more specific — unable to understand the lost love story.

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20/11/24 #2 (reposting thread as couldn't edit to revise)


Revised:


frosted meadow

silver light brushes

the deer's fur


C.X. Turner, UK


(feedback welcome)


Original:


frosted meadow

a silver glow brushes

the deer’s coat


C.X. Turner, UK


(feedback welcome)

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Contestando a

It’s a beautiful image, Luci.

It definitely reads better with “glow”.

How about replacing “brushes” with a more soothing word such as ‘caress’?

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#2

snow

now the moon has left

just snow


Keith Evetts Thames Ditton UK

comments welcome


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Contestando a

Love this Keith, snow re-paints everything.

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#1

grass moon

the orphaned joey’s

two am feed


Lorraine Haig, Aust.

Feedback welcome.


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Contestando a

Thank you Joanna.

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