A TUESDAY FEATURE
hosts: Padma Rajeswari, K.Ramesh
guest editor: an'ya
Only the unpublished poems (that are never published on any social media platform/journals/anthologies) posted here for each prompt will be considered for Triveni Haikai India's monthly journal -- haikuKATHA, each month.
Poets are requested to post poems (haiku/senryu) that adhere to the prompts/exercises given.
Only 1 poem to be posted in 24 hours. Total 2 poems per poet are allowed each week (numbered 1,2). So, revise your poems till 'words obey your call'.
If a poet wants feedback, then the poet must mention 'feedback welcome' below each poem that is being posted.
Responses are usually a mixture of grain and chaff. The poet has to be discerning about what to take for the final version of the poem or the unedited version will be picked up for the journal.
The final version should be on top of the original version for selection.
Poetry is a serious business. Give you best attempt to feature in haikuKATHA !!
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“The measure of intelligence is the ability to change.”
-Albert Einstein
The Haiku Zoom Effect
To discuss just a couple of the many different ways of writing the basic haiku. Take a look at this #1 example which is exceptional because it uses two multiple subjects, like different focuses of a camera lens. This represents only one of the ways to write haiku, which is using the small to BIG view, or moving from a narrow to a WIDE setting.
a snowflake falls (small view)
on the newborn fawn - (Medium View)
old-growth woods (BIG VIEW)
In example # 2, the haiku is reversed and fits the BIG to small view, moving from the wide to a narrow setting. You can see what’s happening in the overall “furthest” environment, beginning at a distance, moving in closer, and then moving to the closest focus of a single snowflake, aka the “zoom effect” in haiku.
old-growth woods- (BIG VIEW)
on the newborn fawn (Medium View)
a snowflake falls (small view) or zoom effect
Haiku Prompt: Feel free to make comment on which of the above examples you like the best, #1 or #2, and tell us “why”. Then post your own haiku on any subject with both views as shown above, and tell us why you prefer one form over the other.
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Post #2
17.3.25
darkening skies the comfort of a raindrop
Mona Bedi
India
Feedback appreciated:)
Joanna-- Great examples. I prefer the second-- big to small...
The f's, r's, and s's in each line are
lovely... Also, the way L2 drops
the melody works so well as a pivot.
#1. 16.3.25
mountain resort
barefoot on tile
the tiny scorpion
Sherry Reniker
USA
Feedback welcome.
This uses the big-to-small zoom effect. It's the one I usually favor, I find. I also used some alliterative "t"'s.
Thank you for the lessons!
16/3/25 #1
storm-torn valley
inside the curled oak leaf
a spider sleeps
C.X. Turner, UK
(feedback welcome)
For this haiku, I prefer the Big View first, because this is what I would first see, the woods. Then smaller things would come into focus.
Post 1
snow on the mountains
in the valley below
kindling for the stove
Adelaide B. Shaw
USA
comments welcomed