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writeALONG! 16 April

A TUESDAY FEATURE

hosts: Muskaan Ahuja, K.Ramesh

guest editor: Iqra Raza


Please note: 


Only the unpublished poems (that are never published on any social media platform/journals/anthologies) posted here for each prompt will be considered for Triveni Haikai India's monthly journal -- haikuKATHA, each month.


Poets are requested to post poems (haiku/senryu) that adhere to the prompts/exercises given.


Only 1 poem to be posted in 24 hours. Total 2 poems per poet are allowed each week (numbered 1,2). So, revise your poems till 'words obey your call'.


If a poet wants feedback, then the poet must mention 'feedback welcome' below each poem that is being posted.


Responses are usually a mixture of grain and chaff. The poet has to be discerning about what to take for the final version of the poem or the unedited version will be picked up for the journal.


The final version should be on top of the original version for selection.


Poetry is a serious business. Give you best attempt to feature in haikuKATHA !!

.....................................................................................................................................


mixed in

with the instructions

her perfume


--- Tom Clausen


This ku really stood out to me, primarily because of its incorporation of Synesthesia (combining two different kinds of sensory inputs). I imagine the poet being instructed to do something - requiring aural skill – but he is at the same time, hyper aware of the fragrance the

instructor is wearing – activating the olfactory sense as well. Interestingly, this is not a reference to distractedness where the fragrance overtakes his ability to comprehend instructions, but instead “mix(es)” in with the instructions making it a truly synesthetic experience


Haiku Prompt: Write a ku that incorporates an element/instance of Synesthesia.

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247 Comments


flip-flops 

— her sari dotted with

muddy rain 


Kala Ramesh #1

Feedback most welcome!

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Apr 22
Replying to

@Padma Priya


I agree with everything that Padma said. This is my favourite of all your ku. The reader can hear the flip-flops, see the dots of mud, feel the rain... The imagery engages the reader's senses; and, through them, her imagination. The imagery is objective, so the poet's presence does not come between the reader and the scene. Similar to the poet's self-effacement, the wording is simple, plain and brief enough to become transparent. Nothing obstructs the reader's view of the scene.


For all the same reasons, here is my second favourite of all your ku:


sparrows

knocking on my window

dawn

 

Concrete imagery engaging the senses, an objective standpoint, nature images, simplicity, clarity, self-effacement... These verses are…

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mona bedi
mona bedi
Apr 19

Post #2

19.4.25


scent of rain

from faraway the sound

of a long lost lullaby


Feedback appreciated:)

Mona Bedi

India

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mona bedi
mona bedi
Apr 20
Replying to

Thanks dear

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summer dawn

the smell of mother's sindhoor

in her photograph


Nisha Raviprasad

India


Post 1


Feedback welcome


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Replying to

Nice.

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#1 bunch of wildflowers... few strangers and I

sway with the breeze Suneet Madan, India feedback welcome

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#2


oldies café

a long forgotten friend

in the beer bubbles


Keiko Izawa, Japan

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Replying to

nice, gentle layering of age and memory

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