top of page

thinkALONG! 3 December

Writer's picture: Muskaan AhujaMuskaan Ahuja

Updated: Dec 3, 2024

A TUESDAY FEATURE

hosts: Muskaan Ahuja, K.Ramesh

guest editor: Keith Evetts


Only the unpublished poems (that are never published on any social media platform/journals/anthologies) posted here for each prompt will be considered for Triveni Haikai India's monthly journal -- haikuKATHA, each month.


Poets are requested to post poems (haiku/senryu) that adhere to the prompts/exercises given.


Only 1 poem to be posted in 24 hours. Total 2 poems per poet are allowed each week (numbered 1,2). So, revise your poems till 'words obey your call'.


If a poet wants feedback, then the poet must mention 'feedback welcome' below each poem that is being posted.


Responses are usually a mixture of grain and chaff. The poet has to be discerning about what to take for the final version of the poem or the unedited version will be picked up for the journal.


The final version should be on top of the original version for selection.


Poetry is a serious business. Give you best attempt to feature in haikuKATHA !!

.....................................................................................................................

This month we're going to draw on classic haiku and some old texts.

 

Two images, separated and juxtaposed, aren’t the only form of haiku.  There are many impeccable examples containing one image (ichibutsujitate), but this week I'd like to focus on those with multiple image elements.

 

the westward sun

the eastward moon

rape blossom...


—Buson


 

Three elements: the sun, the moon, and the blossom, in three distinct parts.  The arrangement paints a beautiful picture. The common link is gold.  It has balance between the sun and the moon, with their particular associations, around the focal point of the blossom.  An example of toriawase, the harmonious “taking and combining of things.”  

 

Bashō has a few with multiple elements.  So does Issa.  This week, find good examples of classic or contemporary haiku or senryu with more than two image elements, where the elements are elegantly arranged and related, and post them here.  Then try to write one.  Paint a picture:


 

a shaft of sunlight

on the vase of roses

music room


— Tim Cremin



Tags:

434 views168 comments

168 Comments


lakshmi iyer
lakshmi iyer
Dec 11, 2024

#1, 11/12


grandchild on my hip

on my left, the hand points up

on the right to the moon


Lakshmi Iyer, India

Feedback welcome

Edited
Like

Jennifer Gurney
Jennifer Gurney
Dec 09, 2024

#1 12-8-24


gloaming

where sun and moon meet

deep exhale of day


Jennifer Gurney, US

Like

Laila Brahmbhatt
Dec 08, 2024

December 8, 2024


Laila Brahmbhatt (Brooklyn, New York) 


Post #2 


The spring rain 

Must have penetrated 

Through the leaves 

To feed the crystal spring 


(By Basho- Translation: Nobuyuki Yuasa) 


Rain combs the crumpled sky.

watches thirsty moon 

sound of jealousy 


(Feedback welcome )

Like

mona bedi
mona bedi
Dec 07, 2024

Post #1

7.12.24


clear blue sky

a swoop of swallows

circles the earth


Mona Bedi

India


Feedback appreciated:)


Like
mona bedi
mona bedi
Dec 08, 2024
Replying to

Thanks Keith! The term ‘swoop of swallows’ is a collective term for a group of swallows. As for encircling the earth is not possible for any bird however grand… here I wished to show the magnanimity of nature even in a swallow.

Like

Kala Ramesh
Kala Ramesh
Dec 06, 2024

Beautiful prompt, Keith Thanks a ton.

Like
bottom of page