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HAIKUsutradhar: 23rd June 2023 Surashree Ulhas Joshi

Updated: Jun 24, 2023

HAIKUsutradhar. weekly prompts

A FRIDAY FEATURE

9th June Lev Hart, the mentor for HAIKUsutradhar, would be pleased to answer your questions and concerns.


hosts: Akila G. & Shreya Narang

the month of May: Surashree Ulhas Joshi


Prompts are based on emotions (called navarasas) that come to the fore when we hear ragas of Indian classical music traditions.


¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬ haikuKATHA - the monthly journal from Triveni Haikai India!

founder/managing editor: Kala Ramesh

associate editors:

Ashish Narain

Firdaus Parvez Hemapriya Chellappan

Priti Aisola Reid Hepworth Sanjuktaa Asopa

Shalini Pattabiraman

Suraja Menon Roychowdhury Vandana Parashar


Haiku, senryu and haiga/shahai (photo haiku) posted here on this thread will be picked up for Triveni Haikai India's monthly journal - haikuKATHA At the moment we are not looking at found poetry, rengay and other split sequences. Other than haiga, no photos are to be shared on our blog on account of storage/memory limitations.

................................................................................................................................. Associate Editors, Madhuri Pillai and Akila G. are stepping down for personal reasons. We wish them the very best. Associate Editors, K. Ramesh and Shobhana Kumar stepped down earlier in the year for personal reasons. A huge thank you to all four beautiful poets. Associate Editors, Reid Hepworth (from Oct 2022), Sanjuktaa Asopa (from 15 October 2022) and Hemapriya Chellappan (from Dec 2022) will be joining us. A huge welcome to all these three lovely poets. _()_ ........... For some more exciting news! CHECK THESE FORUMS: Tanka, kyoka and tanka-prose to be posted on TANKA TAKE HOME and Haibun to be posted on THE HAIBUN GALLERY Please do visit: 'triveni spotlight' 'open sky :: SAMVAAD' and 'thinkALONG' Good poems and challenges are posted in these feature forums. ........

The poems you post will also be considered for the haikuKATHA Monthly Journal each month. Due to a sudden increase in activity, here are some quick guidelines, for HAIKUsutradhar:

1. From September 2022 onwards only 3 haiku (numbered 1, 2 & 3) per week/per prompt are to be posted on HAIKUsutradhar. 2. Please do not post two poems in one day/in 24 hours ... just one and in total only 3 poems per week from Friday to Friday.

2. For each poem you share, please comment on ONE other poem which isn't yours!

3. Post only your unpublished, original poems.

4. If poets have NOT ASKED for FEEDBACK, please don't give. 5. Most importantly, please do not post a variety of drafts, along with a request for readers to choose which they like most. Only one poem is to be posted. ............

Post your best haiku and let's have each issue with your best work.

Poems previously published on your webpage or social media will be accepted.

Poems previously published in peer-reviewed or edited journals or anthologies and contest winners that were published elsewhere will not be accepted.


6. IMPORTANT: if any member provides feedback on the poem in the comment section, the poet must decide on the final version and post it on top of the original version.

Or else the original unedited version on your thread will be picked up by us for the selection.


On your comment thread, you need to post your revised final version (if you have one!)


Edited version: Your final version of the poem goes first, so it will be easy for our team to consider that for the haikuKATHA journal.

Original version: Your first version of the poem remains - under your final version.


***


Prompt:

Raga Lalit: I was blessed to share the stage with my guru from a very young age. This was the first raga that I sang with her. Lalit is considered to be one of the most difficult ragas to sing in the Hindustani tradition. But then…it is also one of the sweetest! If you ask me ‘Karuna’ rasa and ‘Shringar’ rasa can be found by those who look for it! But I will let you decide for yourself. Here’s the link to Veena tai’s rendition of this beautiful raga.


Surashree Ulhas Joshi.


One can post poems off-prompt too. Our Indian saijiki: https://www.trivenihaikai.in/indian-saijiki

From the hosts:

A suggestion: please don't listen to this exposition just once and write multiple haiku. Listen to the singer's raga delineation multiple times. Let the raga soak in you. Internalise the movements, curves and leaps and most importantly the emotion it produces. Link to KARUNA rasa: https://www.wisdomlib.org/definition/karunarasa Karuṇarasa (करुणरस) refers to the “pathetic sentiment” used in dramatic performance (nāṭya). It is a Sanskrit compound composed of the words of karuṇa (pathetic) and rasa (‘sentiment’). This sentiment is produced from a combination of determinants, consequents and complementary psychological states.

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370 hozzászólás


wanda amos
wanda amos
2023. jún. 29.

#1


searching

for a future

down a rabbit hole



feedback welcome - does it need an ellipsis at the end of line 2?

Kedvelés
Sreenath
Sreenath
2023. jún. 29.
Válasz címzettje:

It's a sentence ku and abstract could be the standard objections.

First one could be rectified I suppose :


searching for a future ... a rabbit hole


I personally like it even as it is.

Kedvelés

Sreenath
Sreenath
2023. jún. 29.
Válasz címzettje:

If I understood right there's a suggestion of Van Gogh's own poignant end.

Kedvelés

Anju Kishore
Anju Kishore
2023. jún. 29.

#2

Critique welcome


cracked soil

this thirst for more

highrises

Kedvelés
Sreenath
Sreenath
2023. jún. 29.
Válasz címzettje:

There's a nice suggestion how development is causing eco-disaster

Kedvelés

Padma  Rajeswari
Padma Rajeswari
2023. jún. 29.

ku#3

29 June


Revised with guidance from Lakshmi


mountain path

the bend of the basket

a little more


Original


mountain path

adjusting the basket

he bends little more


Thanks for feedback

Kedvelés
Padma  Rajeswari
Padma Rajeswari
2023. jún. 30.
Válasz címzettje:

Thanks Sreenath, for the suggestion.

Kedvelés

Billie Dee
Billie Dee
2023. jún. 28.

#2---28June23


deep twilight the mockingbird sings my ringtone


---Billie feedback welcome

Kedvelés
Billie Dee
Billie Dee
2023. jún. 29.
Válasz címzettje:

just a suggestion ... would "his ringtone" add meaning relating to "mocking" --Wanda


On the contrary, Wanda. He is mimicking my cellular ringtone. I've even heard mockingbirds mimic car alarms----hence, "mockingbirds."


---Billie

northern mockingbird(Mimus polyglottos)

Kedvelés
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