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haikaiTALKS Q 28: a saturday gathering

Updated: May 21, 2022



*** Q #28 ***

************


haikaiTALKS Q #28: a saturday gathering_under the banyan tree

host: Kala Ramesh


Hearty Congratulations, to Mona Bedi!

Ashish has picked Mona Bedi’s answer as the best reply to his Q!


For the last discussion, click here


Listen to what Ashish has to say:

Dear Kala,

Many thanks to Kavitha for selecting me to post my question last week, to you for allowing me to post my question and to everyone who commented.


When I posed the question, I was well aware that there is not likely to be any definitive answer. Like a river, the boundaries of what haikai is keep changing, as they must.


Kala, you reminded us though that every river has banks within which it flows. These give it definition and beauty. Lakshmi and Neena pointed out that within these limits there is still enough space to successfully combine form with accessibility and spontaneity. Finally, Vandana and Mona made the valid point that even the river breaches its banks. Creativity can and should occasionally trump structure and style, to maintain the vitality that life demands of us.


I was amazed and humbled by the thoughtfulness of each and every response. They have helped increase my appreciation of this beautiful art form.


However I have to choose someone to pass the baton to, and so I nominate Mona. I understand she is a relatively new entrant to haikai (?), yet her answer suggests a thoughtfulness which belies that.


Thanks and regards,

Ashish



Now for Mona Bedi’s Q #27:


Hi Kala, here is my question.


Thanks, Ashish for picking my answer as the best one to his question.

My question is about punctuation and capitalisation in haiku. Though they are up to the poet, and need not follow the rigid rules used, their usage can sometimes be a point of controversy.


Also, the repetition of words or sounds in haiku remains to be explored for budding haijiins.

So my question would be: What are the various forms of punctuation and how many can be used in a haiku? Also does repetition in haiku ad to its weight or take away the essence of haiku.


Sharing an example of each and would like you to add your examples in the answer:


Moving to the sounds

of the shrine river: two women

practising a dance


By David Wright



a poppy,

a field of poppies!

the hills blowing with poppies!


By Michael McClintock


.........

Trivenians are given time until midnight on 25th MAY (IST) to share their views on the subject!

Waiting to read your responses!

your host,

_kala

160 views24 comments

24 Comments


Vidya Shankar
Vidya Shankar
May 27, 2022

Mona, wrt punctuation in poetry, be it haiku or 'mainstream poetry', I am always debating about whether to use them or not, and how much or how little I use them. I agree with Kala when she says "punctuation is ... very personal".


I haven't written much haiku / senryu, and at the moment, when I am still taking baby steps, I prefer writing my haiku without punctuation (ellipses and em dashes that show the pause) as that would help me learn to bring in as much gap between the two images without the need for relying on punctuation. But sometimes, I do use ellipses and em dashes. And of course, capital letters. I haven't started experimenting yet with other…


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mona bedi
mona bedi
May 31, 2022
Replying to

This is lovely and I like it that even when you are still new to haiku as you say, you still have a strong viewpoint! Thanks again😊

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Marcie Wessels
Marcie Wessels
May 26, 2022

This is a very complicated question.


First, thanks for sharing all of the examples. I've never seen the mid-line caesura before today!


And I just discovered Grant Hackett and his use of the double colon. Richard Gilbert published his work this month (or last?) on Heliosparrow.


I think you are quite right. Punctuation obliges the reader to read the poem in a certain way.


That being said, I really like McClintock's use of punctuation in "a poppy". I feel like the punctuation really adds to the poem.


One poppy is a glorious thing. The first line reads like a statement.


A field of poppies! expresses the amazement one must feel seeing an entire field of poppies. The exclamation point drives…


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mona bedi
mona bedi
May 31, 2022
Replying to

Loved this.. the concept of reinforcing the visual is awesome.

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Kala Ramesh
Kala Ramesh
May 25, 2022

The various kinds of punctuation most often used in haiku are: … (ellipsis); - (en dash); — (emdash); : (colon); and in rare cases :: (double colon.) And of course, some haiku are written

without punctuation!


The ellipsis indicates a quiet pause and also suggests the passage of time.

starlit sky …

I touch a turtle before

it enters the sea

— K. Ramesh


the fallen

and the falling leaves …

ten years of war

— Karma Tenzing Wangchu


ancient banyan …

an owl shakes the night

off its feathers


— Anitha Varma


An en-dash ‘–’ is just there to show your reader the cut and actually does little beyond that! In

some cases it shows a clear…


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Kala Ramesh
Kala Ramesh
May 27, 2022
Replying to

Thanks, Lakshmi. _()_

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Kavita Ratna
Kavita Ratna
May 25, 2022

As suggested by Kala, starting with why I think ellipsis is used:


It is to indicate a break... where the two images are closely linked and a pause helps the reader to move from the first to the second, mentally.


I have used it in this:


school band...

left-out children only hear

gravel scrunch

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mona bedi
mona bedi
May 31, 2022
Replying to

Loved this.. the concept of reinforcing the visual is awesome.

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Kala Ramesh
Kala Ramesh
May 24, 2022

Let's start at the very beginning ... Tell me why 'ellipsis' is used!


Waiting to hear from all of you with your examples.


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Kavita Ratna
Kavita Ratna
May 25, 2022
Replying to

Oops. Sorry.