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haikaiTALKS: a saturday gathering! death poems - JISEI

haikaiTALKS: death poems - JISEI

host: Kala Ramesh

12 August 2023

This week shall we try a death poem - called Jisei in the Japanese language? It can be a haiku or a tanka!


For your own poems: Only TWO ku per week, per prompt, per poet.

First post: You'll search and find one you like.

You'll give your reason/s why you like it.

https://terebess.hu/zen/mesterek/Death.pdf Sample poem: death, loss, farewell.

this world

is a dewdrop world

yes … but …

ISSA

Tr. by David G. Lanoue

Second post: This will be your first ku.


Third post: This will be your second ku.

Please give your feedback on others' commentary and poems too. _()_

Keep writing and commenting!

480 views173 comments

173 Comments


Kala Ramesh
Kala Ramesh
Aug 18, 2023

Thanks, Alan:


alone

each second

of breath

a chariot wheel touches

the earth at one point


<>

original


each second

each breath sustains

my life

a chariot wheel touching

the earth at one point alone


third post

feedback always welcome

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Kala Ramesh
Kala Ramesh
Aug 18, 2023
Replying to

Yes, much more effective. touches is as brisk as a second. Thank you.

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Alan Summers
Alan Summers
Aug 18, 2023

Third post:


and the sound

of rain

on doves

the culmination

of tears


Alan Summers

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#3


if someone

would push me

off a cliff

let me soar untethered

into the heavens

comments welcome

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Alan Summers
Alan Summers
Aug 18, 2023
Replying to

.

Hi Susan,


re:

if someone

would push me

off a cliff

let me soar untethered

into the heavens


Fantastic! Just thinking out aloud merely on the sounds of longer assonance perhaps:


if someone

would push me

from a cliff

let me go untethered

into the heavens


kind regards,

Alan

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#2


you’ll be the death of me love


comments welcome

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Alan Summers
Alan Summers
Aug 18, 2023
Replying to

And from my home town of Bristol (England UK):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OS883M7YOJo


😎

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#1


bury me when I die

next to a wine barrel

in a tavern

with luck

the cask will leak

Moriya Sen'an ( d.1838 )


i love the humor in this!

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Replying to

This one didn't say that & i was worried the post would expire too! My apologies!

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